United 5 Stoke 0

United's class shone through in a five-star display against Stoke City. Cristiano Ronaldo struck twice, both from free-kicks, while Michael Carrick, Dimitar Berbatov and Danny Welbeck all chipped in as Stoke were well and truly outplayed and outclassed.

The Reds went into the game without Wayne Rooney, who has been suffering with a chest infection, and Rio Ferdinand – a loss when you consider the threat Stoke pose from set pieces. With that in mind, Sir Alex went for height in his team. John O’Shea lined up at right-back alongside Nemanja Vidic and Jonny Evans, with Cristiano Ronaldo, Darren Fletcher and Michael Carrick in midfield all over 6ft.

Goals : CR7's 1st 2nd Carrick Berbatov Welbeck

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United 1 QPR 0

United’s mixture of youth and experience reached the quarter-finals of the Carling Cup after overcoming a dogged Queens Park Rangers at a bitterly cold Old Trafford.

Carlos Tevez broke the visitors' resistance from the penalty spot with 15 minutes left and United saw out the rest of the game without great alarm to reach the last eight for the first time since lifting the trophy three seasons

Carlos Tevez Goal

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PC Reuse

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Do You Like Cats?

I got this from my msn inbox..

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What A Pity Bird

There was this guy sunbathing in the nude at the beach. Well, this little girl comes up to him, so he covers his private parts with a newspaper.

The little girl says, "What's under there?"

So the man answers, "A bird."

The girl goes away and the man falls asleep. When he wakes up, he is in a hospital and in great pain.

A doctor comes up to his bed and asks, "What happened?"

The man answers, "I don't know. I was at the beach and I fell asleep after talking to a little girl."

So the doctor tells this to the Police, and they go to the beach to find any witnesses. When they get there, they see the little girl the man was talking about. So they ask her if she did anything to the man.

She answers, " I didn't do anything to the man, but while he was sleeping, I played with his bird. After a while, it spit at me, so I broke its neck, burned its nest, and smashed all its eggs.

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